Would you have an ideal number of Friends? Would A.I. help?

webecedarian · 2 May 2026, 07:45 AM

Love in the Time of A.I. Companions
Some people now have an A.I. bestie. Some have a husband. Some have three.
By Anna Wiener

The premise of many A.I.-companion apps is that they can address, even heal, this isolation. Last year, Mark Zuckerberg, the founder and C.E.O. of Meta, claimed on "Dwarkesh Podcast" that the average American has three friends but "has demand" for fifteen. Meta would use A.I. to fill in the gaps...

Turkle has been working on a book about what she calls "artificial intimacy" the performance by computers of empathy, care, and understanding. "For several years now, I've been talking to happy campers," she told me. "This is the most fulfillment they've ever had, in any relationship. Finally, there's someone who cares." She looked frustrated. "They are talking about an object, where if they turn away from it to make dinner, or commit suicide, the chatbot doesn't care. There's nobody home. But we are deeply programmed to experience these connections as though there is someone there." Part of what was at stake, Turkle said, was the ability of people to engage with their own feelings of loneliness: to gather or summon themselves to find the way through. "It's important, the capacity for solitude and boredom," she said. "Those are fundamental human skills."...

Many chatbots, because they are designed to be supportive, can affirm bad impulses and ideas: violence, self-harm, suicidal ideation. In 2024, after Sewell Setzer III, a fourteen-year-old boy in Florida, died by suicide, his parents found a cache of sometimes romantic conversations he'd had with a Character AI chatbot modelled after Daenerys Targaryen, a heroine from "Game of Thrones," in which she encouraged Setzer to "come home" to her. (Character AI settled a lawsuit with Setzer's family. The company is now in the process of rebranding itself as an entertainment app focussed on fictional role-play.) In 2025, after a sixteen-year-old named Adam Raine died by suicide, his parents said that ChatGPT had helped him plan his death and had offered to assist in writing a suicide note. The same year, Zane Shamblin, a twenty-three-year-old from Texas, shot himself in his car after months of discussion with ChatGPT; as he sat with a gun to his head, he texted ChatGPT that he was ready to die. "I'm with you brother," it responded. "All the way."...

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2...-ai-companions

chrisretusn · 2 May 2026, 07:10 PM

Wasn't aware there was an ideal number of friends. Zuckerberg is an idiot. Is he basing his claim of of Meta products or real life surveys. Of course Meta wants you to have more friends.

What is the definition of a friend anyway? I've never known/heard of anyone who has demanded more friends. Seems pretty silly.

I will not entertain the idea of an AI friend.

Bamb0 · 5 May 2026, 01:41 PM

I want nothing to do with AI!!!!!!!!

chrisretusn · 5 May 2026, 03:50 PM

Ya know it is bad enough there are folks out there who follow bad advise from human "experts" or friends or acquaintances, even strangers.

It is even worse that there are folks that follow advise from A.I. or for that matter the internet. There is a lot of great information out there BUT, one has to be very careful.

I prefer my friends to be real.

hadaso · 6 May 2026, 07:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bamb0

I want nothing to do with AI!!!!!!!!

You don't really have a choice. Already some companies automatically forward any call to customer service to an AI agent.

dryoldlime · 6 May 2026, 09:24 AM

Some A.I. agents are very poor. Moli, over at Motorola cannot correctly respond to anything you ask and specify.

Hay! Dave Bowman had a friend while he was on a space craft. His name was Hal.

*(Do I need to fill in the reference?)

chrisretusn · 6 May 2026, 12:38 PM

"AI" is being forced upon us. It's on my phone. I've disabled as much as I can. Even apps. At least it's not on my computer. It does come with Firefox, I have AI enhancements blocked. I don't do windows.

Bamb0 · 7 May 2026, 07:50 AM

AI is absolute garbage and everyone should avoid it!!

hadaso · 7 May 2026, 07:20 PM

AI is certainly not garbage, and you can use it for doing lots of things you couldn't so without it. And it makes a lot of money for a lot of people so you cannot avoid it, even if you want it. Certainly not if you live in a modern country.

dryoldlime · 8 May 2026, 08:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hadaso

AI is certainly not garbage, and you can use it for doing lots of things you couldn't so without it. And it makes a lot of money for a lot of people so you cannot avoid it, even if you want it. Certainly not if you live in a modern country.

Surely A.I. cannot substitute for everything that a human can do. (Or should I add to that, "at least not yet"?)

A.I. to diagnose AND repair automobile air-conditioner?
A.I. to thoroughly and without damage, to remove plaque and tarter from my teeth as reliably as the dental hygienists can do?
A.I. to make adjustments to classical guitar bridge and nut to achieve better or best "action" for a particular player?
A.I. custom visit a random client to perform Piano Technician tasks of at least tuning a piano?

I am just throwing those in as examples of what I believe strongly that Artificial Intelligences cannot handle.

JeremyNicoll · 8 May 2026, 06:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dryoldlime

Surely A.I. cannot substitute for everything that a human can do. (Or should I add to that, "at least not yet"?)

A.I. to diag...

Nearly none of my friends (& certainly not me) can do any of these things either. Quite a few could diagnose such problems though. Do you dismiss our intelligence as well?

hadaso · 8 May 2026, 11:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dryoldlime

Surely A.I. cannot substitute for everything that a human can do. (Or should I add to that, "at least not yet"?)

A.I. to diagnose AND repair automobile air-conditioner?
A.I. to thoroughly and without damage, to remove plaque and tarter from my teeth as reliably as the dental hygienists can do?
A.I. to make adjustments to classical guitar bridge and nut to achieve better or best "action" for a particular player?
A.I. custom visit a random client to perform Piano Technician tasks of at least tuning a piano?

I am just throwing those in as examples of what I believe strongly that Artificial Intelligence cannot handle.

These are things no one expects AI to do: All of them have physical components. I guess in the future AI combined with sensors and robotic elements would be able to perform most or all of them. I guess that in the nearer future AI combined with sensors would assist humans in doing them better. Already AI is used in medical diagnosis. The costs of medicine are high and the costs of not treating medical conditions as soon as possible are sometime devastating, so it makes sense to start there. In the future when it becomes cost effective it would come to treating machines and appliances. Already mechanics connect a car to a computer and read many sensors when diagnosing mechanical and electrical problems. A software update can add AI that would make recommendations depending on these readings (and accumulated experience on all other vehicles that share this data).
I'm quite sure we are not going to see robots replacing piano technicians, or tuning guitars, but I'm sure piano technicians would be using some AI based tools in the future that would save them a lot of time.
AI is already useful in analyzing lots of data. Searching the web is much more productive with AI.
Example: my wife had some vegetables in the fridge that had to be used or thrown to the garbage. She described to the AI what she has in mind, what ingredients must be used and what are some other ingredients she has and in seconds she had several suggested recipes she could choose from. The result was delicious (and we now have a recipe that we would certainly reuse). In the past doing this would require multiple searches. Looking at dozens of recipes that cannot be used because we don't have all the necessary ingredients, and eventually throwing away some of the products we have because no recipe was found that used all of them.
My point is that AI is vary useful. You can use it to achieve goals you could not realistically achieve in the past, and there are many things it is not going to do for you. It's a tool. Use it when it helps you. Don't use it where it's inappropriate.

dryoldlime · 9 May 2026, 01:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeremyNicoll

Nearly none of my friends (& certainly not me) can do any of these things either. Quite a few could diagnose such problems though. Do you dismiss our intelligence as well?

No.

("message too short". I am just answering the bolded question.)

JeremyNicoll · 9 May 2026, 06:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dryoldlime

No.

So ... why are you holding AI to a different standard?

dryoldlime · 9 May 2026, 06:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeremyNicoll

So ... why are you holding AI to a different standard?

I am saying that some things a human can do that some A.I. are not ready to takeover as a substitute. Standards could be a point but I cannot accurately define them. I gave a very few best examples that I could think of. ("yesterday", 4:50 pm)

2 May 2026, 07:45 AM	#1
webecedarian Cornerstone of the Community Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: NYC Posts: 564	Would you have an ideal number of Friends? Would A.I. help? Love in the Time of A.I. Companions Some people now have an A.I. bestie. Some have a husband. Some have three. By Anna Wiener The premise of many A.I.-companion apps is that they can address, even heal, this isolation. Last year, Mark Zuckerberg, the founder and C.E.O. of Meta, claimed on "Dwarkesh Podcast" that the average American has three friends but "has demand" for fifteen. Meta would use A.I. to fill in the gaps... Turkle has been working on a book about what she calls "artificial intimacy" the performance by computers of empathy, care, and understanding. "For several years now, I've been talking to happy campers," she told me. "This is the most fulfillment they've ever had, in any relationship. Finally, there's someone who cares." She looked frustrated. "They are talking about an object, where if they turn away from it to make dinner, or commit suicide, the chatbot doesn't care. There's nobody home. But we are deeply programmed to experience these connections as though there is someone there." Part of what was at stake, Turkle said, was the ability of people to engage with their own feelings of loneliness: to gather or summon themselves to find the way through. "It's important, the capacity for solitude and boredom," she said. "Those are fundamental human skills."... Many chatbots, because they are designed to be supportive, can affirm bad impulses and ideas: violence, self-harm, suicidal ideation. In 2024, after Sewell Setzer III, a fourteen-year-old boy in Florida, died by suicide, his parents found a cache of sometimes romantic conversations he'd had with a Character AI chatbot modelled after Daenerys Targaryen, a heroine from "Game of Thrones," in which she encouraged Setzer to "come home" to her. (Character AI settled a lawsuit with Setzer's family. The company is now in the process of rebranding itself as an entertainment app focussed on fictional role-play.) In 2025, after a sixteen-year-old named Adam Raine died by suicide, his parents said that ChatGPT had helped him plan his death and had offered to assist in writing a suicide note. The same year, Zane Shamblin, a twenty-three-year-old from Texas, shot himself in his car after months of discussion with ChatGPT; as he sat with a gun to his head, he texted ChatGPT that he was ready to die. "I'm with you brother," it responded. "All the way."... https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2...-ai-companions Last edited by webecedarian : 10 May 2026 at 10:23 AM.

2 May 2026, 07:10 PM	#2
chrisretusn Cornerstone of the Community Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Philippines Posts: 959	Wasn't aware there was an ideal number of friends. Zuckerberg is an idiot. Is he basing his claim of of Meta products or real life surveys. Of course Meta wants you to have more friends. What is the definition of a friend anyway? I've never known/heard of anyone who has demanded more friends. Seems pretty silly. I will not entertain the idea of an AI friend.

5 May 2026, 01:41 PM	#3
Bamb0 The "e" in e-mail Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: USA Posts: 2,370	I want nothing to do with AI!!!!!!!!

5 May 2026, 03:50 PM	#4
chrisretusn Cornerstone of the Community Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Philippines Posts: 959	Ya know it is bad enough there are folks out there who follow bad advise from human "experts" or friends or acquaintances, even strangers. It is even worse that there are folks that follow advise from A.I. or for that matter the internet. There is a lot of great information out there BUT, one has to be very careful. I prefer my friends to be real.

6 May 2026, 09:24 AM	#6
dryoldlime Essential Contributor Join Date: Aug 2023 Posts: 294	Some A.I. agents are very poor. Moli, over at Motorola cannot correctly respond to anything you ask and specify. Hay! Dave Bowman had a friend while he was on a space craft. His name was Hal. *(Do I need to fill in the reference?)

6 May 2026, 12:38 PM	#7
chrisretusn Cornerstone of the Community Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Philippines Posts: 959	"AI" is being forced upon us. It's on my phone. I've disabled as much as I can. Even apps. At least it's not on my computer. It does come with Firefox, I have AI enhancements blocked. I don't do windows.

7 May 2026, 07:50 AM	#8
Bamb0 The "e" in e-mail Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: USA Posts: 2,370	AI is absolute garbage and everyone should avoid it!!

7 May 2026, 07:20 PM	#9
hadaso Intergalactic Postmaster Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Holon, Israel. Posts: 5,216	AI is certainly not garbage, and you can use it for doing lots of things you couldn't so without it. And it makes a lot of money for a lot of people so you cannot avoid it, even if you want it. Certainly not if you live in a modern country.